Feeling overwhelmed or trapped? You’re not alone. In fact, you’re part of a silent majority that’s been taught to suffer in silence.

The weight of expectations

This will be a little more personal than usual, but I think it’s relevant to the topic. Many of us have been raised to believe that we must be strong at all times, that asking for help is weakness, that feeling overwhelmed is a personal failure, that feeling anything (other than anger) is a flaw.

We live in a world that celebrates toughness and independence. We’re told to “just get over it” and “be strong.” We’re expected to handle everything on our own, to never show vulnerability, to always have our lives together.

The push towards ruthless individualism in some cultures has lead us to this and it can make many people simply miserable.

This cultural pressure creates a perfect storm of isolation and shame. When we’re struggling, we feel like we’re the only ones. When we can’t handle everything, we feel like failures. When we need help, we feel weak.

My own experience with dark times

In my case during dark times I would regularly go to bed thinking that it would be nice to not wake up again. I am very aware and very grateful of all the privileges I have, I am by no means someone who is in a bad situation at life, and I still have gone (and will go) through dark times mentally. It happens to all of us and it’s ok to reach out for help.

I want to be clear about something important: struggling with mental health doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful or that your problems don’t matter. You can have a good life, good relationships, good opportunities, and still feel overwhelmed, trapped, or hopeless.

Mental health struggles don’t discriminate. They don’t care about your income, your education, your family background, or your achievements. They can affect anyone, at any time, regardless of how “good” your life looks from the outside.

What helped me find my way out

In my case what helped me out of the dark times was getting into Stoic philosophy to learn to “domesticate” my feelings, focus on what I can control and try to live with justice, wisdom, courage and temperance.

Stoicism taught me several crucial lessons:

Focus on what you can control: Most of what causes us suffering is outside our control. The weather, other people’s actions, the past, the future. When I learned to distinguish between what I can change and what I can’t, a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.

Accept your emotions without being ruled by them: Stoicism doesn’t teach you to suppress your feelings. It teaches you to observe them, understand them, and choose how to respond to them. You can feel overwhelmed without being overwhelmed.

Practice the four virtues: Justice (treating others fairly), wisdom (making good decisions), courage (facing difficult things), and temperance (moderation and self-control). These became my compass when I felt lost.

For you it might be something else, maybe your religion, a philosophy, a mental health professional or support from friends and family.

The key is finding what works for you. What resonates with your values, your beliefs, your personality. What gives you a framework for understanding your struggles and tools for working through them.

You don’t have to go through this alone

Even if you have nobody that you feel comfortable reaching out and can’t afford a professional, there are resources for you. Maybe something like Buddhism or Stoicism will work for you, or maybe some of the new online mental health services like BetterHelp can be affordable for you. Maybe there is a government provided or pro-bono resource that you can access. It is ok, we should be a community and we should help each other, it’s ok to reach out.

Here are some practical resources to consider:

Free or low-cost mental health resources:

• Crisis hotlines (available 24/7 in most countries)
• Online therapy platforms with sliding scale pricing
• Community mental health centers
• University counseling centers (often open to the public)
• Religious or spiritual communities
• Support groups (both in-person and online)

Philosophical and spiritual approaches:

• Stoicism (books, podcasts, online communities)
• Buddhism (meditation, mindfulness, local groups)
• Other philosophical traditions that resonate with you
• Religious communities and spiritual practices

Self-help and education:

• Books on mental health and psychology
• Podcasts about mental health and wellness
• Online courses and workshops
• Apps for meditation, mood tracking, and stress management

Recognizing when you need help

It’s important to know the signs that you might need professional help:

Persistent symptoms:

• Feeling overwhelmed or trapped for weeks or months
• Changes in sleep patterns (too much or too little)
• Changes in appetite or eating habits
• Loss of interest in things you used to enjoy
• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
• Feeling hopeless or worthless
• Thoughts of self-harm or suicide

Impact on daily life:

• Difficulty maintaining relationships
• Problems at work or school
• Neglecting personal hygiene or responsibilities
• Using substances to cope
• Withdrawing from social activities

If you’re experiencing any of these symptoms, please reach out for help. You don’t have to wait until things get worse. Early intervention can make a huge difference.

Breaking the stigma

We need to change how we think about mental health. Feeling overwhelmed isn’t a personal failure. Asking for help isn’t weakness. Struggling with your mental health doesn’t mean you’re broken or defective.

It means you’re human.

We all have limits. We all need support sometimes. We all go through difficult periods. This is normal, and it’s okay.

By talking openly about mental health, we help others feel less alone. We show them that it’s okay to struggle, okay to ask for help, okay to not have everything figured out.

Practical steps to take right now

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or trapped, here are some immediate steps you can take:

1. Acknowledge your feelings: Don’t try to push them away or pretend they don’t exist. Name what you’re feeling. Write it down if that helps.

2. Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend who’s struggling. You’re doing the best you can with what you have.

3. Take small actions: You don’t have to solve everything at once. What’s one small thing you can do today to take care of yourself?

4. Reach out: Even if it’s just to one person you trust. You don’t have to share everything, but let someone know you’re having a hard time.

5. Consider professional help: If you’re struggling, therapy can be incredibly helpful. Many therapists offer sliding scale fees or free consultations.

The power of community

We’re not meant to go through life alone. Humans are social creatures. We evolved to live in communities, to support each other, to help each other through difficult times.

When you reach out for help, you’re not just helping yourself. You’re showing others that it’s okay to do the same. You’re contributing to a culture where people can be honest about their struggles.

You’re making the world a little bit better for everyone who comes after you.

The Stoic perspective

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” — Marcus Aurelius

This quote captures the essence of what helped me through my darkest times. You can’t control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond to it. You can choose how you think about your situation, how you interpret your feelings, how you move forward.

This doesn’t mean you should ignore your problems or pretend everything is fine. It means you can choose to focus on what you can change, accept what you can’t, and find meaning and purpose even in difficult circumstances.

The bottom line

Feeling overwhelmed or trapped is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign that you’re human, that you’re dealing with real challenges, that you need support.

Asking for help is not a failure. It’s a sign of strength, of self-awareness, of courage. It takes bravery to admit you’re struggling and to reach out for support.

You deserve help. You deserve support. You deserve to feel better. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Please reach out. To a friend, a family member, a mental health professional, a crisis hotline, or any of the resources mentioned above. There are people who want to help you, who are trained to help you, who can help you find your way through this.

You matter. Your struggles matter. Your life matters.

Please reach out.